THE MIDDLE

They say that you are the beginning and the end. While that’s all good, swell, neat, great and all those nice little pleasant words. I seldom hear anyone speak about the middle. You may be the beginning; you created all, brought all into an existence that was previously not. You may be the end, the finisher, He who holds all of eternity in the palm of His hand. But what do they say about the middle. You know the portion of existence that we struggle through, the part of this thing we call life that no one can seem to get a handle on. Are you the middle as well? Or do you conveniently create, sit back and watch as that which you created struggle, stumbles, fight over non fundamental reason and then step in at the end of your creations life and hold a rod of judgment for their lack of understand, willpower, resolve and wisdom. So we hear that you are the beginning and the end, but are you also the MIDDLE? You know, that point in your creations life where they seem to have nothing left to fight for, that moment when they cry out to a “higher power” but get no reply. Are you the middle as well? You know, those segments in our walks on this planted where everything crashes and we have nothing left to sustain a suitable state of being. Are you the Middle too, or are you solely the beginning and the end. Is this destined to be the way of life we are forced to endure, a life where we cry out with no reply, a life where we struggle to make ourselves acceptable, to make ourselves appear more like you……starting something, then watching as it struggles to find meaning, know that the answers lie within us.

Or is it that just as much as you are the beginning, just as much as you are the end, you ALSO are the MIDDLE……Is this existence more meaning full then we could have, can or ever will comprehend? Is it that not only do you encompass what was, and what will be, but that you also encompass what is! Could it be that we, the creation, are so bogged down by the trials of life, the pressures of being, the tests of existence that we focus on what was and what could be, and neglect to realize what is. Are you also the middle? You know that moment in our journey when we must weigh the outcomes of every variation of every decision possible to calculate which is the better, perhaps lesser of all evils, or greater of all great decisions. Are you also the middle, where it appears we are all alone, yet strangely there is a presence of something we just can’t seem to grasp? Could it be that we merely, in our endeavor to succeed, or journey to understand, our quest to figure out what this all really means, glance over the fact that the middle consists of you just as the beginning and end do? Can there ever be a particular fragmentation in the MIDDLE that we see through the questions, through the uncertainty, through the enigma that is meaningful life, and see YOU. We struggle, we toil, we wrestle all for something that we know, we understand, we realize is finite. Yet we labor still. Could there…….could there be a moment, even if briefly, that our existence is transformed by the revelation that not only are you the beginning, not only are you the end, but you are also the MIDDLE. That time in our journey, when everything is wrong, yet somehow we know that it is alright.



Isaac A Valentin

Our True Master

I sit here and I struggle on how to begin this blog. I have wanted to write this for some time, but something impeded my progress every time. It is now known to me what that debilitating force was……………Cowardess. “Wait did he really just say that? Did he just call himself a COWARD?!” Yes…yes I did, just one of many, “Dirty Little Secrets”. You see I’m writing this because it has hit me close to home as well. As Christians we claim that Jesus is our Lord and our master, but it is quite evident that there is another entity that guides our hands, another force that many don’t want to admit, but a force that masters us more then we allow “our Lord” to. We as Christians in America have become Cowards! We hide behind facades and aliases so that we can’t be held responsible for “our” words or actions. We tolerate those who would demean, slander, and hurt others behind a pseudo personality. All because they are afraid of the consequences of their actions, consequences they have no desire of dealing with.
We rather hide behind a Twitter persona and give them power over us, then handing our “dirty little secrets” over to the ONE we claim is our Master and Lord. American Christianity says it’s ok to be a Coward, as long as you don’t portray that in public. Please share your thoughts about others to the world; just don’t let the world know it is really you. We would rather be comfortable then see God bless us in our discomfort. We want to have blessings upon blessings from God, just without the blood, sweat and tears, put into years and years of doing the Lords work. We trade the anointing power and knowledge of God Almighty, for humanly power, and the knowledge of private issues of those around us.
Since when has Christianity been about self gain and exultance? Is not our mission to do the Lord’s work? Is not our goal to bless the Lord with our actions and speech? Is not this life a life that is to be completely surrendered to Jesus? If so, we can not be completely surrendered to Jesus if we are still mastered by a cowardly spirit. If you have not read into my “dirty little secret” by now, then let ME share it with you. For years I have found it easier to associate and befriend those that don’t claim to have a master in Jesus Christ. I’ve had a hidden fight inside towards people claiming to be “Christians”. Why is that? Simply…..for the reason I am writing today (and I include myself first off in this!!!!!). We as Christians in America rather hide behind pseudo realities and hurl slanderous words towards those we see fit. But those that don’t claim to have what we have (relationship with Jesus); don’t seem to have that problem. They will tell you (in detail) everything they think about you. But I guess since we claim to be followers of Christ then we have to wear those masks and costumes and masquerade as if we have no issues with any human on the planet. I guess that is what Jesus died and rose again for. I guess that is what he really requires and commands us to do.
Ill be it, it may be hurtful to have a face to face “discussion” (blow up) with someone. But let us walk through this. I blow up in someone I know or a friend’s face and tell them all the things I think about them or feel about them. We both get angry at the other person, possible storm off and that ends the confrontation. But what that does is allow room for us to return and settle things, to talk about what happened and move on.
But when I hide behind a pseudo persona on Twitter or Facebook, and begin to catapult every dark and dirty thing I’ve kept inside about everyone, all that does is cast out the net of bitterness and perversion that I’ve been trapped under all this time. We say to ourselves: “it’s better that “I know ya’ll” then for you to really know me.” And it seems that we as American Christians would rather have the latter.

So I must examine myself…. I must ask the hard questions.


Am I a COWARD?


Who REALLY is my MASTER?

A Book and its Cover

As I made my way to work today that popular phrase came to my mind. “Don’t judge a book by its cover.” I can remember times in my life when I was judge simply for the way I looked or dressed. I can also remember times when I in turn have formed judgments about others simply for outward attributes. I thought about this and realized that those covers that individuals choose to place on themselves tell the observer a lot and nothing at the same time.

How many times have I pick up a book, and simply because of the illustration (or lack there of) I decide that that book is not worth investing my time in. I don’t know if any of you have done that, but for me that is the story my history tells. If the outward attributes (the things I can see) don’t intrigue me, then I keep moving on in search of something to place my time and effort into. This can also be applied to our relationships (or lack there of). We meet, or see someone for the first time and it’s like picking up that book. If the outward attributes that person has chosen to clothes them selves with (the way they dress, how they carry themselves, their hair style…etc.) don’t intrigue us or draw us in, then we simply move on and say, “That person is not worth investing my time in”.

So what is the point of “not judging a book by its cover”? You see the cover of a book doth not make the book. A cover may tell you a few thing, perhaps one main event in the book, perhaps the author of the book or perhaps it doesn’t tell you anything at all (blank covers). Only when we jump into a book and read each word on each page can we fully understand what a book is about. Each page gives us a small amount of the intricacies of what that book is trying to convey to us. Only at the end do all those intricacies culminate to paint a picture of what the author wanted us to read, and why a specific cover was chosen (if one exist).

By judging others merely on outward attributes, we neglect and pass over the opportunity to jump into the pages of their story, to read each word on every page of their history. We never get a hold of the intricacies of their life that culminate at the present time and allow us insight on why they have chosen to place on themselves the specific cover they wear and we possibly miss out on an opportunity to make a life long companion in this life. I have a friend now that I thank God I was able to meet, even though our judgments of each other would have never allowed us to create the friendship we have. When I first saw Nick, my judgment of him was nothing less then negative and I received a like judgment from him. I thought he was one of those people I try to stay away from, because they irk me too much (It can also be said that he thought the same of me.) But by chance a few years later we ended up on the same traveling drama team. This gave us the opportunity to get to know one another (whether we wanted to or not. Let’s just say I should have kept driving the van…haha….sorry if you don’t know what I’m talking about). Once we relinquished our past judgments of each other we realized that there were some chapters of our live that had similarities. And now I can say that Nick knows more about me then anyone of my other friends. That type of bond can not be created through passing judgment on glimpses of ones “cover”. The only way to build a close bond, a tight relationship is to get past the cover and dive into the words and pages of someone history, what story do they hold. What does that story tell you about the cover they have chosen to wear?

A book may have its cover, and the cover may be extraordinary, but what really matters is what the pages of that book hold. What story do they tell, what history will unfold as the pages begin to unfold and turn. The answer to these questions can not be found simply by judging the cover; rather one must dive into every word on every page. Only then will everything culminate and you will see the true picture that author is trying to convey.

By Isaac A Valentin

The Giver of Life

At night I try to strain my eyes to see exactly what's going on. The darkness clouds my vision blurs. But I’m still amazed at how God can bless a sinner like me… you see the thing that shrouds my sight, is the sin I commit outwardly and inside. The guilt sets in and blocks my heart it stops and threatens my life as part of just retribution. I breathe, I gasp for air’s not there. My lungs collapse, I think, I track my past for facts. This cold it rushes flushes my every limb. The facts set in; I could’ve fought my sin. Alas the past has passed this fate on my plate, nothing left but to accept and wait ………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………Warmth invades my chest as I rest and wait, is it not too late? I squint I try to focus my eyes, a hand, a face the blur remains. A scar, a hole, could it be, the warmth enters my veins, the spread relieves the pain. The blur subsides, the darkness hides, and my eyes lay hold of the Giver of Life. I sit and stare as light illuminates as far as I can see. As I rise to my feet, the Giver of Life smiles as he looks at me. But NO…my fate was transferred away from me, I stare, I look, I gasp as the Giver of Life shuts His eyes. His breath ceases to be, the life I received, I know now was not free. The tears they pour, I can't take no more. My feet ache and begin to run. Life I try to understand why the Giver of Life gave his life for me. I run and run as far as I can see! STOP!!! Wait…could it be? The Giver of Life is standing in front of me. But I saw, I heard, I witnessed his end. But truly the Giver of if here with me. I sense, I feel a LOVE unreal. This is it, now I know; the Giver gave His Life so I could see. That He loves and cares and wanted to see me free. His life for mine, my life is His. The Giver of Life, Jesus Christ, my freedom paid, now I to live my LIFE!

WHY

In a time when it seems that the world outside of Christianity has more to offer then the one inside of the walls of a Holy covenant with the Creator. Why do we continue in this strenuous battle to be saved, to save others and to daily but our best foot forward in an attempt to live close to the Word of our father as we can. What is it that makes us wake up day after day and not throw in the towel?
If we were to be honest with ourselves, then we would see that we can be a selfish, greedy, prideful people. We drive in our 2005 Toyota Corollas and covet the Jaguar that just drove by us. We walk around Malls and city streets with our iPhones and Blackberry's and lust after the person’s phone that is walking in front of us, because it is “the newest model”. And we are driven to make the next agenda on our list to quench that burning desire inside of us. Yet we gather together in our churches and small group and say we are willing to give everything up for the name of Christ. So again I ask, why do we really continue in this world of Christianity? What makes us wake up day after day and not throw in the towel?
We see people living without the Creator and it seems that they are prosperous and that they are “living the life”. It would appear that they have no issues, no problems. They have money, family, social status, health. All the things that most humans desire, and to add insult to injury, THEY DID IT ALL WITH OUT THE CREATOR. And still there are those that follow the Creator, that devote their lives to His teaching and His commands, that drive vehicles that are literally falling apart, barely have enough money to buy a burger off the dollar menu at McDonald's, whose family is in turmoil and whose health is deteriorating. Yet if you ask them to give up the life they have in exchange for money, fame, health and an “easier” life, they would look you in the eyes and sincerely and wholeheartedly refuse.
We look in the Bible and we find reports of all those who where beating and murdered for following the Creator and spreading His teaching. We read their stories of how badly and horrendously they were tortured, beat and ridiculed. How some were forced to watch as their family members were murdered one by one in front of them. And how when it came time for them to stand before their murders, after watching the ones they loved brutally killed, they would choose to die over giving up their love for the Creator. What is it that allows Christians to choose their love for the Creator, even when face to face with the people that are about to end the very life that they have lived for Him?
I have been in many conversations that end up with the parties involved asking this very question. WHY? Why do we keep doing what we are doing? Why do we keep believing what we are believing? In those moments when I’ve been in the presence of those questions or even when I have asked myself the same questions in a more solitary environment, I think of one thing. JESUS.
Every time I here the name Jesus, and read of what he did. I ask myself, WHY, why did he come to this planet? Why did he live a life as a mere man? He was there in the beginning, when there was nothing, and there at the end of the seven days when there was everything. He was in a place that we as humans can only begin to imagine, a place where he was worshiped continually. Yet he gave it all up, he left it all behind to come to a place where he would be ridiculed, beaten, his skin ripped from his body, a place where he would be murdered. Why would he leave Heaven and its entire splendor, to come to the dirty, filthy, greedy, selfish, petty, prideful realm of mankind?
Why would Jesus do this……because we NEEDED him to. We were on a road that lead to destruction, the bridge was out and we couldn’t stop the train in time. The Creator knew that we were unable to save ourselves, so he sent his only son to come and save us. Jesus came to mankind, died and resurrected and in doing so created a new bridge for us to pass over. You see we were all heading for hell, for we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. That is why Jesus came and died for us, He loved us to much to sit there and do nothing.
So why do we wake up every day and not throw in the towel? Why have saints since the beginning of the church given their lives to follow and spread the teaching of the Creator? Because those that are still on a train to hell NEED us to. We love them to much to sit back and do NOTHING!

Dead End

"When we must always have control over every aspect of our lives, we are telling God that we know how to get where we are supposed to be better then he does. When in reality we are like mice trapped in a maze attempting to reach a piece of cheese. No matter how many turns we take, there is always a wall there to meet us at the end. All the while God (who is greater then we) is standing there looking down at us saying...."I see and know the way you need to go, let me lead you"....the question is, will we set aside our pride and follow God, or will we let our selfishness lead us on a perpetual journey of dead ends?"

The Family...pt 1.

I drive around in the endless sea of boredom. Roaming from here to there as sanity strives to keep its grip on the frail world that it reluctantly claims residency in. Pondering how to purge this world, which holds my service in it’s twisted hands, from the stench of the action less beasts that wander in stagnancy and pollute the air of those who dream and desire the ambitions of a world more active and fruitful. I see the faces of those that would dare to aspire for a greatness alien to this world that keeps them captive. I see their noses cringe and the countenance disintegrate as the beasts of this world intoxicate them with their stench of indolence in successful efforts to murder any spark of motivation in the hearts of those that would rise up and topple the current regime’s power and authority. Day after Day, my mind battles and wars with ways of breaking the bondages that the foul beasts have places on the people of this world that I grant my service to. Day after Day I see dreams torn apart and desire burned away by the acidic poison that corrupts that air that is inhaled by its inhabitants. I fear that one man is not capable of overthrowing the power of this world’s lord. So as I drive from here to there I am ever vigilant, training my eyes to spot those that I may introduce to The Family. Secretly hoping that one day, as The Family grows, our unity will bring relief from the grasps of sub-mediocrity that we all now face.